The relay: Van trouble
CALISTOGA, Calif. — We haven’t had a van breakdown, as my headline would imply. The vans themselves are trouble. Let me explain. Each team has two vans, with six runners in each. Today, for instance, before we’d even gotten to the starting line, we missed a turn and went 10 miles the wrong way. That’s how it is for two straight days. You’re basically lost, driving a boat on wheels with six smelly, annoyed people in it. All the while having to stop constantly to provide cheers and water and an appropriately upbeat song for your runner on the course. (Again: No course. Running on side of road.)
The back half of the van is usually car sick. The front half of the van is sick of hearing the back half complain about it. By Sunday, you can feel the tension. Or sometimes people just scream at each other. The Relay usually starts out as the most team-oriented, feel-good event you’ve ever done, and by the end you find yourself punching someone for eating Doritos too loudly. It’s the dynamics of a marriage, condensed into one weekend.
More on the van later, but a quick update on how we’re doing, starting with a shot of the starting line …
They start teams in waves of 20 or so, every half hour starting early this morning. The slow teams go first. The fastest teams won’t leave until this afternoon and will finish way, way ahead of us. The winning teams usually run around five-and-a-half minute miles, which should be against the rules, punishable by forehead thumping, but hey, it’s for charity. We can’t discriminate against cheaters.
Our first runner was Tom Fanelli, from Turlock, Calif. (Pictured below)
Honestly, I have no idea what anyone’s connection to Tom is. He’s someone’s friend. Six months before The Relay, everyone is stoked. Three months out, everyone is likey. Three weeks out, people get flaky. Stuff comes up, and by stuff I mean people start to think, “Wait, we’re going to run 200 miles in a downpour along a highway? I just remembered I have to dismantle my dishwasher and scrub the parts individually with Wet-Naps.” Point being, you take the people you can get, and anyone who will join last minute is your new best friend. Tom will probably be in my wedding someday.
The guy in red is our driver, Robby Lewis, Mr. Energy, and he is without question our fastest runner. So of course we have him driving, not running. Perhaps that wasn’t good planning on our part, but at least we have a back-up plan should anyone’s knee go all Kevin Garnett in the home-stretch.
I’m Runner No. 6, so my first leg is coming up. It’s raining harder. I will be whiny. So you have that to look forward to.
May 2nd, 2009 at 4:01 pm
Mattie,
I love the “speed marriage” and that Tom will be in your wedding someday.
May 5th, 2009 at 10:39 am
What was running through my head in the pic above: “Ah crap … what did I get myself into?!”
It was all worth it, though. Definitely some good times. And I guess I get to go to your future wedding, too. Bonus!
Cheers!
May 12th, 2009 at 3:06 pm
Tom, don’t get excited – Matty is the bachelor type – not likely a wedding is in his near future!
May 12th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
A note from Van 2 – Our van clearly had more fun – don’t remember anyone getting annoyed with eating Doritos too loudly – we all had a big love fest in our van. We probably had less sleep but more showers. Oh, yeah, and less beer, because lets face it – it’s really an uncomfortable proposition when you have a cop as one of your runners!! Oh, yeah, and it only rained during one of our runner’s legs – the last one for Rudy – yes, that is a brag – sorry Van 1 – you got screwed and not in a nice way!
LOVE your blogs, Matty – you can be on the team EVERY year!
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